Sunday, May 28, 2017

Scenes on an Airplane to Surat

Surat, the city of flyovers, diamonds and everyone driving on the wrong side.

Although it has been some time since I shifted here, but my romance with this city of Farsaans started only recently. Something in me melted, a few knots opened and I fell for this mad mad city.

It happened only last week when I took the Air India flight from New Delhi to Surat.
Here is what happened Mota Moti -

1.       2-3 Families with 6 to 7 members exchanged seats with a dozen other travelers.3 poor souls caught in this conundrum started complaining. Poor steward had no clue (as it was all in Gujarati) and requested all passengers to take their own seats. Obviously, no one listened to him.

2.       Flight was delayed by 10 mins and then suddenly a Gujju uncle stood up, opened top 3 buttons of his shirt, solved this puzzle in a jiffy and pacified everyone. Easy Che !

3.       Only one old Grandma had to be seated away from her family but she showed her resentment by saying bad words in Gujarati. (Ganda, I think)

4.       Meanwhile, Sweet Gujju Girls (SGG) wearing crop tops and hot pants for air travel, chatted merrily

5.       Any purpose served by dimming Cabin Lights was lost as Diamonds sparkled brilliantly on every wrist, neck and finger.

6.       Everyone clapped when the aircraft took-off and landed. Old Grandma burped both times.

7.       Theplas and Namkeens were taken out as soon as the flight was airborne.

8.       Captain announced (Thrice) – Passengers are requested to remain seated while the seat belt sign is turned on.

9.       Steward to SGG – Would you like anything to drink ?
 SGG to Steward – Jeeru Che ?

10.   Wailing infant was “crowd surfed”  from 13B to 18A

11.   All phones rang in unison even before the plane landed.

12.   While I waited for my luggage, Gujju uncle still having Top 3 buttons of his shirt open, inquired about everything from my career path to my personal hygiene.

13.   While I was wondering what to do as “No Uber was available”, a family offered to drop me at my area in their chauffeur driven Audi

Such is the city. Live it. Love it.

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